(I want to send out a special “thank you” to the future Dr. Newman, whose feedback, guidance and counsel made it possible for me to bring this post to life… and for not losing your patience or good humor in the face of my incessant questioning)
In the spirit of physical “body conditioning” training – and by default, nutrition – I was recently made aware of a connection between weight-training based exercises and the prevention of Alzheimer’s. In this day and age, most people are familiar with Alzheimer’s: an affliction of the brain where disease onset is most closely associated with advancing age. I want to state for the record that I AM NOT A DOCTOR! but my understanding – based on my own perceived “reasonably thorough” internet research – is as follows: Alzheimer’s is the most common type of dementia in which a person loses cognitive function due to abnormal clumps, tangled fibers, and disconnection of nerve cells in the brain. This results in cell death, which manifests as shrinkage of the affected areas of the brain. It is important to note, however, that Alzheimer’s is NOT a normal part of the aging process; it IS a disease, and as such, measures can be taken to prevent it. One of these measures is weight-training based exercises.
Dr. Ronald Petersen, director of the Alzheimer's Research Center at the Mayo Clinic, said on ABC: "Regular physical exercise is probably the best means we have of preventing Alzheimer's disease today, better than medications, better than intellectual activity, better than supplements and diet."
What are weight-training based exercises?
Also referred to as strength training, you can get the necessary results with weight machines like you find at the gym, free weights, resistance tubing, or even using your body’s own weight. Examples of exercises using your own body weight include: push-ups, pull-ups, abdominal crunches and leg squats.
How do weight-training based exercises help to prevent Alzheimer’s?
While the brain is not a muscle, it CAN atrophy (a fancy medical term meaning your body part is wasting away) from lack of use. If you don’t maintain conditioning of your muscles, your body loses muscle mass – which is what tends to happen as people age and/or they become less physically active. In the brain’s case, the brain itself begins to shrink in size. When muscles are strong, the heart has doesn’t have to work as hard pumping blood which in turn carries oxygen & nutrients to the brain and your other body parts. Therefore, the strength training not only makes sure your organs are “fat and happy” by delivering all of those nutritional things they need to stay in good shape, but the “freeways” in the brain that are being used for those deliveries (aka “neural plasticity”) are kept – through regular use - from getting all tangled and clumped together.
Supporting medical research
Unfortunately, none of the medical research explains WHY exercise helps the brain stay in good functional order; just that it does. One hypothesis suggests that we, as human beings, are genetically designed for physical activity. In today’s society, a lifestyle of inactivity and continuous access to the food supply is the norm (versus the hunter-gatherer, feast and famine lifestyle of ancient times)… Humans haven’t changed much genetically in the last 10,000 years; therefore, this “inactive” lifestyle and other environmental factors are causing our bodies to be more susceptible to chronic conditions like Type 2 Diabetes, coronary heart disease, certain cancers… and yes, you guessed it: Alzheimer’s (Booth, Chakravarthy, Gordon & Spangenburg, 2002). “Interestingly, a number of epidemiological studies have shown that exercise can have a beneficial effect on AD (Alzheimer’s) by slowing down the onset and progression of the disease.” Previous studies noted in one article indicated that less active older people have over a 200% chance of developing Alzheimer’s, as opposed to active older people who have a 60% less chance of developing it (Briones, 2006, p.53).
Respecting the temple
I read about many, many instances where physically active people STILL developed Alzheimer’s, and it seemed like in a lot of cases a severe blow to the head would also lead to the disease. Unfortunately, because they don’t know what actually causes Alzheimer’s there is no fool-proof way to prevent it, but in the case of body conditioning and working out, there are so many other benefits – weight control, emotional and physical well-being, less likely to develop other chronic conditions, etc. – the benefits clearly outweigh the laziness factor, at least they do in my case.
From my own perspective, my brain holds everything that makes me… me. I can’t imagine anything more devastating than losing pieces of myself. My personality. My spirit… my soul. I can’t imagine my loved ones being witness to something like that. I started my workout program in part due to a promise I made to the Bunny. But maybe it was to put me in a place where I could gain some additional motivation to take better care of myself over the long-term – so that even though my husband couldn’t be with me, he could still contribute towards giving me the chance to live a better life. A chance I’m going to take, and run with. Or maybe… sweat with. This is a game I want to win.
If you remember nothing else, remember this: Eat tasty & nutritious food. Breathe deeply. And be good to your body… it deserves your love and attention.
References:
Booth, F. W., Chakravarthy, M., Gordon, S., Spangenburg, E. (2002). Waging war on physical inactivity: using modern molecular ammunition against an ancient enemy. The American Physiological Society. J Appl Physiol 93: 3 – 30. http://www.jap.org
Briones, T. (2006). Environment, Physical Activity, and Neurogenesis: Implications for Prevention and Treatment of Alzhemier's Disease. Current Alzheimer Research, 3(1), 49-54.
Lunde, A., Mayo Clinic. www.mayoclinic.com. Alzheimer’s blog.
Friday, October 23, 2009
Saturday, October 17, 2009
Love Is
I frequently search out good quotes and sayings on the internet... usually ones that reflect my mood. Here's one I found this morning that just kind of stuck with me... I don't know who the author is, but it's the message that's most important.
"I don't pretend to know what love is for everyone, but I can tell you what it is for me; love is knowing all about someone, and still wanting to be with them more than any other person, love is trusting them enough to tell them everything about yourself, including the things you might be ashamed of, love is feeling comfortable and safe with someone, but still getting weak knees when they walk into a room and smile at you."
Peace.
"I don't pretend to know what love is for everyone, but I can tell you what it is for me; love is knowing all about someone, and still wanting to be with them more than any other person, love is trusting them enough to tell them everything about yourself, including the things you might be ashamed of, love is feeling comfortable and safe with someone, but still getting weak knees when they walk into a room and smile at you."
Peace.
Friday, October 16, 2009
Back And Forth
It’s been a rough couple of days; I found myself feeling overwhelmed, mentally revisiting life from a year ago… Following the weekend celebration of the Bunny’s birthday in Las Vegas, a month and a few days later I would be standing next to his hospital bed in the ICU – not realizing yet that he was already gone, despite physically being there with beeping machines to insist otherwise.
I think back to last year, and I don’t remember crying much. I was busy being “strong” – validating the perception that most people have of me – but I wonder if “numb” is a more accurate description. When things are happening (like someone you love is dying), there are always a lot of to-do’s to get done. Now, to-do’s… that’s something I really know how to handle. In a strange way it was comforting to have so many, because ‘getting things done’ is so familiar, so…. safe. It’s a very linear process. You start at the top of the list, and slowly, methodically, you cross things off as they are completed. Very structured and organized. Very much a part of my personality.
But having a year between me and those events, with most of those to-do’s put to bed, there isn’t much in the way of my emotions now running rampant. Or, those emotions have finally caught up to my brain (remember, my heart goes at its own pace in these matters). Now, as my mind replays last year’s events, my heart is the sitting on the couch; the only viewer. And the longer these images flash on the screen, the longer the tremors ripple deep inside that cause my tears to erupt from the surface.
I know enough to seek out my friends right now. Those people in my life that I have a special connection with; that most especially ‘get’ me. They are elite from the respect that I know they will let me be, and not try to ‘fix’ me, or act as if I am being over-indulgent, and why don’t I just “get over it already.” As much as I feel the pain of losing my husband, I really don’t think I could survive it without my friends. They are truly what makes me strong – kind of like Sampson and his hair.
So these last few days… I have been a breath away from tears. Not the silent, streaming down your face one at a time kind of tears, but the “perfectly okay one minute, and bursting out sobbing the next” type – which probably would scare most passerby, small children and cute, fuzzy woodland creatures. I am reminded of a geyser – call me “Old Faithful.” I make a plan to meet one of my friends, and I’ve no sooner stepped out of the car when I start crying. Hard. This is the scene I’ve been playing out over and over this week.
I’ve read that grief is anything but linear. It’s like the numbers in the stock market – any event in the world at any given time will act upon those numbers, causing them to shoot straight up to sky or drop like a stone in a well. That’s grief. It is so “out of my control.” It is so unstructured, unorganized. I’ve read about it… but now I know firsthand what those people are talking about. I know what it FEELS like… I have the benefit of real-world application of some academic, conceptual idea. And having this knowledge makes me different. It makes me better able to meaningfully connect with other people. Experiences like this tend to isolate us from each other, and I am a bridge – just like my friends are my bridge, making me feel I am still a part of this world.
I think my numbers are on their way back up. I don’t feel like those “overwhelmed” feelings are quite so near the surface as much, now that I’ve let off some of the pressure. I’ve also been schooling for a new church choir to sing regularly with – I haven’t been singing much lately, and clearly not doing so has had a significant negative impact on my emotional well-being (singing is another one of my bridges).
I find that when I am receptive to it, there are always little things here and there to be hopeful for. It helps to start somewhere, so I can work up to those bigger things, like love and happiness.
Slowly, methodically… guess I should start at the top of the list.
I think back to last year, and I don’t remember crying much. I was busy being “strong” – validating the perception that most people have of me – but I wonder if “numb” is a more accurate description. When things are happening (like someone you love is dying), there are always a lot of to-do’s to get done. Now, to-do’s… that’s something I really know how to handle. In a strange way it was comforting to have so many, because ‘getting things done’ is so familiar, so…. safe. It’s a very linear process. You start at the top of the list, and slowly, methodically, you cross things off as they are completed. Very structured and organized. Very much a part of my personality.
But having a year between me and those events, with most of those to-do’s put to bed, there isn’t much in the way of my emotions now running rampant. Or, those emotions have finally caught up to my brain (remember, my heart goes at its own pace in these matters). Now, as my mind replays last year’s events, my heart is the sitting on the couch; the only viewer. And the longer these images flash on the screen, the longer the tremors ripple deep inside that cause my tears to erupt from the surface.
I know enough to seek out my friends right now. Those people in my life that I have a special connection with; that most especially ‘get’ me. They are elite from the respect that I know they will let me be, and not try to ‘fix’ me, or act as if I am being over-indulgent, and why don’t I just “get over it already.” As much as I feel the pain of losing my husband, I really don’t think I could survive it without my friends. They are truly what makes me strong – kind of like Sampson and his hair.
So these last few days… I have been a breath away from tears. Not the silent, streaming down your face one at a time kind of tears, but the “perfectly okay one minute, and bursting out sobbing the next” type – which probably would scare most passerby, small children and cute, fuzzy woodland creatures. I am reminded of a geyser – call me “Old Faithful.” I make a plan to meet one of my friends, and I’ve no sooner stepped out of the car when I start crying. Hard. This is the scene I’ve been playing out over and over this week.
I’ve read that grief is anything but linear. It’s like the numbers in the stock market – any event in the world at any given time will act upon those numbers, causing them to shoot straight up to sky or drop like a stone in a well. That’s grief. It is so “out of my control.” It is so unstructured, unorganized. I’ve read about it… but now I know firsthand what those people are talking about. I know what it FEELS like… I have the benefit of real-world application of some academic, conceptual idea. And having this knowledge makes me different. It makes me better able to meaningfully connect with other people. Experiences like this tend to isolate us from each other, and I am a bridge – just like my friends are my bridge, making me feel I am still a part of this world.
I think my numbers are on their way back up. I don’t feel like those “overwhelmed” feelings are quite so near the surface as much, now that I’ve let off some of the pressure. I’ve also been schooling for a new church choir to sing regularly with – I haven’t been singing much lately, and clearly not doing so has had a significant negative impact on my emotional well-being (singing is another one of my bridges).
I find that when I am receptive to it, there are always little things here and there to be hopeful for. It helps to start somewhere, so I can work up to those bigger things, like love and happiness.
Slowly, methodically… guess I should start at the top of the list.
Monday, October 12, 2009
Last Birthday
We celebrated your last birthday in Las Vegas
You, me, and my son made three
Your son might also have joined us
But for a last-minute change in plans
You kept your cool as I laid out the weekend
You know what an organizational freak I am
I love being hostess
And this weekend, your birthday weekend, was special
It was the big 5-0
One of those milestones, people say
One of those birthdays you remember your whole life
To the soundtrack of the rings and dings of slot machines
We wined, we dined, we saw a show
But the best part was “Dolphin Trainer for a Day”
You made me promise that we would do it together, someday
But this day, your birthday, was special
A picture of you with that dolphin hangs on my bedroom wall
I look at it every day
And I smile at the memory of your last birthday
We celebrated your last birthday in Las Vegas
This year, I’ll celebrate alone
But I think about that last one
It’s one of those birthdays I’ll remember my whole life
Shirley D. Downie
October 7, 2009
You, me, and my son made three
Your son might also have joined us
But for a last-minute change in plans
You kept your cool as I laid out the weekend
You know what an organizational freak I am
I love being hostess
And this weekend, your birthday weekend, was special
It was the big 5-0
One of those milestones, people say
One of those birthdays you remember your whole life
To the soundtrack of the rings and dings of slot machines
We wined, we dined, we saw a show
But the best part was “Dolphin Trainer for a Day”
You made me promise that we would do it together, someday
But this day, your birthday, was special
A picture of you with that dolphin hangs on my bedroom wall
I look at it every day
And I smile at the memory of your last birthday
We celebrated your last birthday in Las Vegas
This year, I’ll celebrate alone
But I think about that last one
It’s one of those birthdays I’ll remember my whole life
Shirley D. Downie
October 7, 2009
Saturday, October 10, 2009
Out Of The Box
Here it is, the continuing saga of my fantasy love life. The “fantasy” refers to the condition that while I have felt attraction for certain individuals in my path… the stars have always been misaligned in terms of the potential for a real-live relationship. And maybe that’s a good thing for me, just barely coming up on the year anniversary of losing the Bunny.
So here’s the latest. In a previous post I described my tendency to feel attracted towards someone immediately – the elusive x-factor that, if missing, is a sure sign the relationship will not have any long-term staying power. And just when I think I have THAT whole thing figured out, the universe comes along to throw a proverbial wrench at my hypothetical monkey. In the current case, the attraction thing is working in reverse. Met the guy; good-looking, fairly decent, funny, smart… but I think at the time I was otherwise distracted. Or the attraction thing didn’t hit me like a semi truck... which is what I normally expect and therefore look out for. But as time has gone on, it seems that this sneaky devil takes up more and more of my thoughts (the more he gets in my head, the more attractive he becomes). And this is more than a little unsettling for me, because when my thoughts get monopolized, that’s when I begin my “fantasy relationship.”
True to form, the stars are a bit crooked with this mystery guy as well. Nothing a few revolutions and a little gravitational pull couldn’t cure, I’m guessing… but the foreignness of the whole thing throws me off a bit. Again, if I am looking for the usual signs, I would also have to say I get no “attraction vibes” from his direction (towards me) – and that’s another thing I can usually sense pretty clearly. No, he isn’t gay (there was a time in my life that I would go from being attracted to one homosexual guy after another – so much so that I would often joke about being a gay man trapped in a woman’s body – the makings of very funny story-telling; just another day in my life!).
Like the others the came before, I will simply let things run their course. No harm, no foul, and in the meantime my mind is kept busy. At least with these fantasy relationships I can feel confident in the knowledge that I won’t forget what to do when a real relationship comes my way.
So here’s the latest. In a previous post I described my tendency to feel attracted towards someone immediately – the elusive x-factor that, if missing, is a sure sign the relationship will not have any long-term staying power. And just when I think I have THAT whole thing figured out, the universe comes along to throw a proverbial wrench at my hypothetical monkey. In the current case, the attraction thing is working in reverse. Met the guy; good-looking, fairly decent, funny, smart… but I think at the time I was otherwise distracted. Or the attraction thing didn’t hit me like a semi truck... which is what I normally expect and therefore look out for. But as time has gone on, it seems that this sneaky devil takes up more and more of my thoughts (the more he gets in my head, the more attractive he becomes). And this is more than a little unsettling for me, because when my thoughts get monopolized, that’s when I begin my “fantasy relationship.”
True to form, the stars are a bit crooked with this mystery guy as well. Nothing a few revolutions and a little gravitational pull couldn’t cure, I’m guessing… but the foreignness of the whole thing throws me off a bit. Again, if I am looking for the usual signs, I would also have to say I get no “attraction vibes” from his direction (towards me) – and that’s another thing I can usually sense pretty clearly. No, he isn’t gay (there was a time in my life that I would go from being attracted to one homosexual guy after another – so much so that I would often joke about being a gay man trapped in a woman’s body – the makings of very funny story-telling; just another day in my life!).
Like the others the came before, I will simply let things run their course. No harm, no foul, and in the meantime my mind is kept busy. At least with these fantasy relationships I can feel confident in the knowledge that I won’t forget what to do when a real relationship comes my way.
Thursday, October 8, 2009
Just What You're Worth
This poem was copied onto one of the pages a sympathy book given to me by friends and coworkers of me and the Bunny… a heartfelt thank you to Adriana Flores, and the rest of the Bowne family.
When I come to the end of the road
And the sun has set for me,
I want no rites in a gloom-filled room,
Why cry for a soul set free!
Miss me a little - but not for long
And not with your head bowed low.
Remember the love that we once shared,
Miss me, but let me go.
For this journey that we all must take
And each must go alone;
It's all a part of the Master's plan
A step on the road to home.
When you are lonely and sick at heart
Go to the friends we know,
And bury your sorrows in doing good deeds.
Miss me, but let me go.
- Edgar Albert Guest (1881-1959)
When I come to the end of the road
And the sun has set for me,
I want no rites in a gloom-filled room,
Why cry for a soul set free!
Miss me a little - but not for long
And not with your head bowed low.
Remember the love that we once shared,
Miss me, but let me go.
For this journey that we all must take
And each must go alone;
It's all a part of the Master's plan
A step on the road to home.
When you are lonely and sick at heart
Go to the friends we know,
And bury your sorrows in doing good deeds.
Miss me, but let me go.
- Edgar Albert Guest (1881-1959)
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
Won't Be Long Now...
well...as our wedding pictures so plainly and obviously show, i had put on a little weight. i had been sick and wasn't going to the gym, and stopped riding on the weekends and (unfortunately) at the same time was eating all the wrong things...and LOTS of them!! so now...the wedding and reception are over...i'm feeling better, it's the beginning of june and i realize i've only got a couple few months before our annual 'amtrak century'. i head on back to the gym and to my absolute disgust, tip the scale at 237-1/2. i thought for quite a while that it was broke but after double checking on the scale we have at work it was confirmed...i was a lard ass!! so...my goal was to get back to the weight i was for last years century which was somewhere around 222 - 224. My 'ultimate' goal has always been to get down to 210...although that has been more my 'fantasy' weight as opposed to a reality weight. Well....that fantasy is getting closer and closer to a reality all the time. as of this morning, after finishing up the tues morning spin class, i weighed in at 216. a full 21-1/2 lbs lighter than 2 months ago, BUT...much more important, only 6 measly pounds away from my 'ultimate' goal. with a little bit of luck (and quite a few more spin classes) i might even get pretty damn close to 210 for the century.
just in case anyone is interested, the thing that has made the 'most' difference (other than the constant exercise of course) is that i have pretty much given up sugar. that has always been one of the main points driven home for the 'atkins' diet and now for the latest rave, the 'south beach' diet. they also list caffeine and alcohol, but i always drink a cup of coffee before each work out and i do have 1 beer a week (oh yeah....and last sunday i had a small bowl of rocky road!! mmmmmmm...it was soooooo GOOD!).
things are going well here, shirley should be starting her 'real' job around the 8th. trevor's doing good 'across the pond'. if you ever want to chat with him he is on AIM quite a bit. his sign on is DragonMaster9066. and just for the hell of it, his e-mail is dragon_master606@hotmail.com. Ummmm, there's suppose to be an 'underscore' between dragon and master but you can barely see it because the whole thing is underlined.
k, well...gotta go get ready for work
love to you all...Russ
(email to the family, dated August 26, 2003, approximately three months after our wedding)
just in case anyone is interested, the thing that has made the 'most' difference (other than the constant exercise of course) is that i have pretty much given up sugar. that has always been one of the main points driven home for the 'atkins' diet and now for the latest rave, the 'south beach' diet. they also list caffeine and alcohol, but i always drink a cup of coffee before each work out and i do have 1 beer a week (oh yeah....and last sunday i had a small bowl of rocky road!! mmmmmmm...it was soooooo GOOD!).
things are going well here, shirley should be starting her 'real' job around the 8th. trevor's doing good 'across the pond'. if you ever want to chat with him he is on AIM quite a bit. his sign on is DragonMaster9066. and just for the hell of it, his e-mail is dragon_master606@hotmail.com. Ummmm, there's suppose to be an 'underscore' between dragon and master but you can barely see it because the whole thing is underlined.
k, well...gotta go get ready for work
love to you all...Russ
(email to the family, dated August 26, 2003, approximately three months after our wedding)
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
Sadness Captured
Photograph by: Joe Latter
Joe Latter Photography
562.437.0480
www.joelatterphotographer.com
Wardrobe alterations by: Robert Sancedo
Robert Sancedo, Designer/Stylist
323.256.6437
Wings by: Angela Jarman
Fancy Fairy & Goblin's Closet
707.642.6666
www.fancyfairy.com
Locket by: Jim Binnion
James Binnion Metal Arts
360.756.6550
www.mokume-gane.com
Hair by: Alyse Roen, Stylist
714.377.9262
Monday, October 5, 2009
A Perfect Circle
Received this in my in box today. Thanks, Victoria...
Two men, both seriously ill, occupied the same hospital room.
One man was allowed to sit up in his bed for an hour each afternoon to help drain the fluid from his lungs. His bed was next to the room's only window. The other man had to spend all his time flat on his back. The men talked for hours on end. They spoke of their wives and families, their homes, their jobs, their involvement in the military service, where they had been on vacation..
Every afternoon, when the man in the bed by the window could sit up, he would pass the time by describing to his roommate all the things he could see outside the window.
The man in the other bed began to live for those one hour periods where his world would be broadened and enlivened by all the activity and color of the world outside. The window overlooked a park with a lovely lake. Ducks and swans played on the water while children sailed their model boats. Young lovers walked arm in arm amidst flowers of every color and a fine view of the city skyline could be seen in the distance. As the man by the window described all this in exquisite details, the man on the other side of the room would close his eyes and imagine this picturesque scene. One warm afternoon, the man by the window described a parade passing by. Although the other man could not hear the band - he could see it in his mind's eye as the gentleman by the window portrayed it with descriptive words.
Days, weeks and months passed.
One morning, the day nurse arrived to bring water for their baths only to find the lifeless body of the man by the window, who had died peacefully in his sleep. She was saddened and called the hospital attendants to take the body away.
As soon as it seemed appropriate, the other man asked if he could be moved next to the window.
The nurse was happy to make the switch, and after making sure he was comfortable, she left him alone. Slowly, painfully, he propped himself up on one elbow to take his first look at the real world outside. He strained to slowly turn to look out the window besides the bed.
It faced a blank wall.
The man asked the nurse what could have compelled his deceased roommate who had described such wonderful things outside this window. The nurse responded that the man was blind and could not even see the wall. She said, "Perhaps he just wanted to encourage you."
I'll let you take away what you will from this story. Peace.
Two men, both seriously ill, occupied the same hospital room.
One man was allowed to sit up in his bed for an hour each afternoon to help drain the fluid from his lungs. His bed was next to the room's only window. The other man had to spend all his time flat on his back. The men talked for hours on end. They spoke of their wives and families, their homes, their jobs, their involvement in the military service, where they had been on vacation..
Every afternoon, when the man in the bed by the window could sit up, he would pass the time by describing to his roommate all the things he could see outside the window.
The man in the other bed began to live for those one hour periods where his world would be broadened and enlivened by all the activity and color of the world outside. The window overlooked a park with a lovely lake. Ducks and swans played on the water while children sailed their model boats. Young lovers walked arm in arm amidst flowers of every color and a fine view of the city skyline could be seen in the distance. As the man by the window described all this in exquisite details, the man on the other side of the room would close his eyes and imagine this picturesque scene. One warm afternoon, the man by the window described a parade passing by. Although the other man could not hear the band - he could see it in his mind's eye as the gentleman by the window portrayed it with descriptive words.
Days, weeks and months passed.
One morning, the day nurse arrived to bring water for their baths only to find the lifeless body of the man by the window, who had died peacefully in his sleep. She was saddened and called the hospital attendants to take the body away.
As soon as it seemed appropriate, the other man asked if he could be moved next to the window.
The nurse was happy to make the switch, and after making sure he was comfortable, she left him alone. Slowly, painfully, he propped himself up on one elbow to take his first look at the real world outside. He strained to slowly turn to look out the window besides the bed.
It faced a blank wall.
The man asked the nurse what could have compelled his deceased roommate who had described such wonderful things outside this window. The nurse responded that the man was blind and could not even see the wall. She said, "Perhaps he just wanted to encourage you."
I'll let you take away what you will from this story. Peace.
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